VOICED®

Every Voice Matters®

Get VOICED
Log in
VOICED
EVERY VOICE MATTERS
  • Home
  • Topics
    • VOICED Policy
    • VOICED Mind & Body
    • VOICED Men
    • VOICED Women
    • VOICED Humor
    • VOICED Him & Her
    • VOICED News
    • VOICED College
    • VOICED Travel
    • VOICED Society
    • VOICED Money
    • VOICED Animals
    • VOICED Artificial intelligence
    • VOICED Arts
    • VOICED Auto
    • VOICED Blockchain
    • VOICED Books
    • VOICED Business
    • VOICED Cryptocurrency
    • VOICED Eats
    • VOICED Entertainment
    • VOICED Environment
    • VOICED Gaming
    • VOICED Marketing
    • VOICED Motivation
    • VOICED Philosophy
    • VOICED Psychology
    • VOICED Real estate
    • VOICED Religion
    • VOICED Science
    • VOICED Spirituality
    • VOICED Sports
    • VOICED Style
    • VOICED Technology
    • VOICED Work
    • VOICED World
  • Topics
    • VOICED Policy
    • VOICED Mind & Body
    • VOICED Men
    • VOICED Women
    • VOICED Humor
    • VOICED Him & Her
    • VOICED News
    • VOICED College
    • VOICED Travel
    • VOICED Society
    • VOICED Money
    • VOICED Animals
    • VOICED Artificial intelligence
    • VOICED Arts
    • VOICED Auto
    • VOICED Blockchain
    • VOICED Books
    • VOICED Business
    • VOICED Cryptocurrency
    • VOICED Eats
    • VOICED Entertainment
    • VOICED Environment
    • VOICED Gaming
    • VOICED Marketing
    • VOICED Motivation
    • VOICED Philosophy
    • VOICED Psychology
    • VOICED Real estate
    • VOICED Religion
    • VOICED Science
    • VOICED Spirituality
    • VOICED Sports
    • VOICED Style
    • VOICED Technology
    • VOICED Work
    • VOICED World
  •  
Get VOICED

Liked By

Get VOICED

Create an account to join the conversion.

You'll be able to publish your own stories, follow your favorite people, create a better news feed experience and comment on content you love.

Sign up with Google Sign up with Facebook Sign up with Email
Already have an account? Sign in.
Terms of Service

Log in

You know what to do.
Forgot password?
OR
Log in with Google Log in with Facebook
No account? Sign up.
Terms of Service
  • Followers
  • Following
By Pablo M. on Unsplash

10 “Normal” Relationship Habits That Are Actually Toxic

  
Kate Brunotts
Oct. 02, 2020
Follow
Share tweet pinterest reddit email
Shares

All is fair in love and war, but that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s healthy. When it comes to love, a lot of our relationship habits end up being incredibly toxic. Here are 10 seemingly normal relationship habits that hurt more than they help. 

1. Stonewalling 

Stonewalling is refusing to communicate about an issue or express thoughts and feelings surrounding a particular subject. This can manifest itself in perpetually sweeping things under the rug especially major differences in opinion that affect your daily lives as a couple. 

Don’t get me wrong— Taking a quick walk or break to collect your emotions and thoughts during the heat of the moment is a great idea. However, this should always be done under the promise to reconnect and express your concerns in a hopefully constructive discussion later on.

Ignoring issues or giving someone the cold shoulder doesn’t make issues goes away— It only makes them more volatile and builds resentment. You can’t read your partner’s mind, so don’t expect them to read yours either. 

2. Obsessing Over Texts 

Strangely enough, being over digitally connected can damage your IRL connection. While it’s important to set aside a couple of minutes every day to truly connect and listen to one another, obsessing over text messages (or the lack thereof) isn’t healthy.

Speak to your partner about your texting habits and try to find a “check-in” agreement that works for both of you. Or, you can save up your stories by writing down things to share with your partner in your notes app. That way, you can still both enjoy your time apart, but you’ll remember everything you wanted to tell them when you reconnect later. 

Giving your partner undistracted time on their own gives them the chance to miss you and truly invest interest whenever you’re actually together. 

3. Using Social Media To Validate Your Relationship

Who doesn’t love an adorable #goals photo? While the occasional picture together only seems natural, be careful not to document every aspect of your relationship. Constantly posting lavish public displays of affection can put a lot of unnecessary pressure on the relationship. 

4. Depending On Your Partner To Fix Your Emotional Issues

The only one who has the power to change your feelings and thought patterns is you. While your partner can certainly be supportive, they are not responsible for your happiness, nor should they be. 

5. Having Regular Big Blow Out Fights 

Intense passion doesn’t equate to having a healthy relationship. If you and your partner are constantly in a cycle of high highs and low lows, it may be time to reevaluate the health of your relationship as a whole. 

In addition, you and your partner should be able to fight fair— That means truly listening to each other, validating feelings that you don’t necessarily share, and creating action plans to improve as a couple. Name-calling, yelling, saying harsh things that you “don’t mean”, etc. simply isn’t acceptable. 

While it may take some time for you to iron out a productive way of resolving conflict, you both need to work to do so. Don’t forget that you can always reach out to a counselor or therapist to help you resolve your issues in a fair, balanced way. 

6. Spending Every Waking Second Together

You and your partner probably spend a lot of time together if you’re in a committed, romantic relationship. While quality time is important for maintaining your connection, it’s important that you and your partner continue to pursue your individual goals and interests. 

After all, you fell in love with one another due to your unique dreams and desires. Spending time apart gives you time to reflect on your relationship and come back as a stronger, well-balanced couple. 

Moreover, be sure that you have a support network outside of your romantic partner. At the very least, have 2 to 3 friends or family members who you could call on a bad day. 

7. Admiring Jealousy 

Having jealous tendencies is not “cute”. It doesn’t mean that your partner “loves you so much that they don’t want to share”. Rather, it’s an indicator that your partner is somewhat insecure and has room to improve. 

You and your partner should feel comfortable talking to one another about your feelings, good and bad. While some level of jealousy may be natural, when it starts dictating how you act around one another, it’s incredibly unhealthy. 

8. Not Communicating About Physical Intimacy 

Talking about sex and physical intimacy can be incredibly difficult and awkward but it’s vital to the health of your relationship. Physically intimate acts can also be deeply emotionally intimate, so it’s important to check-in with one another on a regular basis to make sure that everyone’s needs are met in full. 

In addition, you shouldn’t just talk about ways to make your partner feel safe and secure— Don’t forget to have a conversation centered entirely around pleasure. Physical intimacy only gets better when you choose to open up a dialogue with your loved one. 

9. Keeping Score 

As tempting as it may be to have a tit-for-tat relationship, maintaining such an even balance on a regular basis can be incredibly exhausting, not to mention unhealthy. Instead, you and your partner will likely go through periods where one person is taking on more responsibilities than the other. This position should shift back and forth between the two of you, but try not to hyperfocus on small, day to day discrepancies. 

You can always communicate with your partner about which chores or tasks they would rather do. That way, you can each manage your own domains without having to worry about the other. 

10. Not Having An Escape Plan 

Some people believe that “planning” for a break-up or signing a prenuptial agreement invalidates the basis of a relationship. While obviously you hope to stay together, crafting an “escape plan” before following through with a major life milestone like moving in together or getting married is important. 

This way, you can both feel as secure as possible in a worst-case scenario. It also reminds you not to take your partner for granted— Signing a lease or acquiring a ring does not mean that you should stop putting in effort with your partner. 

Seeing anything familiar? If you experience any of these actions within your relationship, it may be time to take a step back and figure out the best way for you to grow as a couple. There is always room for improvement. 

 2
Jessica Kashian
baxter
  
Kate Brunotts
Oct. 02, 2020

Comments

Comment has been published successfully..!!
From VOICEDMARKET
What’s this?

What is this?

Voiced Market offers exclusive deals on products and services from brands big and small. Customers can find their favorite items and get introduced to new ones, all at a fraction of the normal retail price. Voiced Market believes in giving brands of all sizes an equal opportunity, and also cares about giving back, devoting a percentage of its profits to help educate and feed those in need. Have a product or service you'd like to sell? Contact us at [email protected]

$7 Off Your First Order Of $12+ With Grubhub
View Deal
Free Credit Score & Monitoring From Credit Sesame
View Deal
Free 7-Day Trial To Live & Streaming Service Philo TV
View Deal
Show more deals

Popular on VOICED

14 Ways Politicians Are Exactly Like Toddlers


  
lynsey free
15 Jan Read more

10 “Normal” Relationship Habits That Are Actually Toxic


  
Kate Brunotts
02 Oct Read more

9 Signs You’re A Good Partner


  
Kate Brunotts
21 Aug Read more

Colleges Are Robbing Students During The Pandemic: Why Don’t W...


  
Kate Brunotts
19 Aug Read more

Greenwashing: Why It’s A Problem, And How To Spot It


  
Quinlan Grim
07 Aug Read more

Why We Should Stop Making Fun Of Influencers


  
Quinlan Grim
06 Aug Read more

WTF Is Wrong With America: Put On Your Mask


  
jason
30 Jun Read more

It’s Not ‘Just A Joke’ — Your Words Matter


  
Quinlan Grim
16 Jun Read more

Less Meat, Less Heat: How The Climate Crisis Is Reshaping The ...


  
Quinlan Grim
29 May Read more

VOICED®

Every Voice Matters®

Menu
  • About
  • Sign Up
  •  
  • Code of Conduct
  • Terms of Use
  • Privacy Policy

Interact with us

Interact with us

© 2016-2021 Voiced Media, Inc. All Rights Reserved.